Successful and unsuccessful people tend to repel each other, at least in terms of forming close friendships. One reason is that unsuccessful people are constantly complaining. They’re veritable fountains of grievances. They do dozens of times per day, usually without being aware of it. If you ask them what they think of any random celebrity, it’s a virtual guarantee they’ll focus mainly on what they don’t like about that person.
The big secret in life is that there is no big secret. Whatever your goal, you can get there if you’re willing to work.
– Oprah Winfrey
If you don’t understand this simple step, then you will waste a lot of time. Step 1 is to decide. Not to ruminate or to ponder or to ask around and see whether or not you can do it. If you want to start your own business, then decide to make it so. If you want to be married and have a family, then decide to attract a mate. If you want to change careers, then decide to do so.
It blows my mind that people think that something else has to come before the decision. People waste months trying to figure out, “Is this goal possible?” And this makes a lot of sense to do so if you’re at a certain level of consciousness. But all you’re really doing is creating delay, and you’ll simply manifest evidence to suggest that the goal is both possible and not possible. You think doubt in your head, you find doubt in the world.
Time and again I’ve seen evidence that not only people, but the universe itself, can sense a lack of commitment to a goal. Have you ever heard someone tell you about a goal of theirs, and you can just sense how wishy-washy and uncertain they are about it? They say things like, “Well, I’m going to try this and see how it goes. Hopefully it will work out OK.” Is that evidence that a clear decision has been made? Not remotely. Are you going to help this person? Probably not — who wants to waste their time on someone who isn’t committed?
(Simply put, you have to decide you want to achieve your goal, not wonder whether you can do it or not)
– Steve Pavlina
You see… the real solution to complaining is responsibility. You must say to the universe (and mean it), “I want to accept more responsibility for everything in my experience.”
Here are some examples of what I mean by accepting responsibility:
- If I’m unhappy, it’s because I’m creating it.
- If there’s a problem in the world that bothers me, I’m responsible for fixing it.
- If someone is in need, I’m responsible for helping them.
- If I want something, it’s up to me to achieve it.
- If I want certain people in my life, I must attract and invite them to be with me.
- If I don’t like my present circumstances, I must end them.
– Steve Pavlina